ORIKI: A NEGLECTED ANTIDOTE FOR MARITAL PEACE

To say that my mother-in-law liked me during her lifetime was an understatement. She truly loved and respected me dearly. I also have never seen her as mother-in-law. She was my mum.  I had the honour of conducting her final bath when she died.

During one of her long stays with us, I had asked her to teach me my husband's oriki. She gladly accepted and for about five days, she taught me and ensure that I memorised three fairly long oriki of my husband's family, my mother-in-law's lineage and that of his great-grandmother.

Some lines of the oriki were quite really funny. Little did I know that I have possessed a tool for a lasting marital peace. Even if she married another wife today,  I know that with oriki, I will forever remained precious to him.

ORIKI is a cultural poetic-praises of a family or an individuals. It often contains lots of exaggerated acts of bravery, love, entrepreneurial skills, royalty and uncommon qualities traced to the origin of the person concerned. It is most common in Yorubaland, but I don't know if it exists among other tribes of Nigeria.

In most cases, oriki, can unravel the original ancestral home and even link husband and wife together as belonging to the same family or origin. Oriki have tendency to unite two warring parties together. Also, if misused, (rarely) it could prolonged enmity.

Women are the custodians of oriki. No man,  how matter angry he could be, would listen to his oriki from a woman, (especially wife or mother) and continue with his anger. Never. He must calm down, at least, for that moment. It is very doubtful if a woman who knows how and when to recite oriki would not get whatever she wanted, how matter big from her husband.

Sadly today, an average modern wife is careless about this enduring marital gift. Rather, what today's wife know how to do is to argue with British accent and Queen's English, as well as memorise all the latest hip-hop in town( Peoples Comrade had once labelled me olden days wife).

However, It's not too late, you can secretly learn your husband oriki today and see what you have been missing. Take charge of your home, it goes beyond pretty face, curvy figure and shout of "baby".  Get back home and Go cultural a bit!

I hope our ladies will learn from this. A word is enough for the wise.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Credit: Ajimot Ashogbon